"Posing” Family Portraits - and the Art of Letting it Fall Apart | Minneapolis Kid and Family Photographer

Family Portrait "Posing”

and the Art of Letting it Fall Apart

This post isn’t about the intricacies of family posing. It’s about why I start with a pose, and then let it all fall apart, plus a few tips and tricks.

We’ll get you in the semblance of a pose and then let it dissolve.

This is what I tell families when we’re about to start a portrait session. “Then into the semblance of another pose and let that dissolve. And so on.”

Why I start with a pose at all:
I’ll arrange everyone so I can you all, have light on everyone, and have you all very close together to start. I may start with you sitting on a bench, cuddled together on floor, or standing. We’ll get to them all though.

Why it’s just the “semblance” of a pose and not a pose-pose:
I aim for laid back sessions with lots of laughing and playing around. When posing families and little ones, I’m not married to any particular outcome or position. There are so many factors and even more ways to creatively adjust as needed. If a pose isn’t working for any reason - the toddler wants to stand not sit, or an older sibling has opinions about holding younger sibling in their lap - we try for a bit, then change it up. The toddler can stand by a parent instead of sitting in front. Maybe siblings both lay on their tummies, or backs, or older sibling thinks it’s funny to have younger sibling sit on them instead of in their lap. You get the idea. There’s always a way to do it differently.

And here’s why I let it dissolve:
I find it’s in those “falling apart” moments that you can really see the relationship, interaction, and laughter unfold. Also, kids simply don’t sit still for long. So after we let the pose fall apart, maybe we try for another looking-at-the-camera-smiling shot, but then the little one gets to run out of the frame, or sneak up on Mom, or get on Dad’s shoulders, or whatever!

Pose Progression (or rather, regression - the “dissolve” part)

Your goal coming into the session may be for looking-at-the-camera-smiling shots. We definitely start here, and return here often.

I’ve always loved the real life, natural, all-out-laughing one at the end. People are rarely looking at or even aware of the camera.

And bonus: many times there’s a fabulously funny, goofy, or eye-roll-y one in the middle.

We get it all along the way.

Troubles and Tips

Here are a couple quick diversions, switches, and changes we can and will make along the way:

  • You’re holding baby who keeps looking away from me.
    Spin yourself around so now baby is facing me and you turn your head towards me too.

  • Kid calls my bluff when I say “Whatever you do, doooon’t smile” (I can’t trick them all).
    Well, first I take a serious shot or two, because I do also love and relate to those serious, somber little ones. Then we shake it up (keep reading)…

  • Little one is nervous / not interested / throwing fake camera smiles left and right - or we just need to shake it up for whatever reason.
    Movement. I’ll cue you to spin, swing, bounce, tickle, (safely) toss, tip upside down, put on shoulders, dance, jump on the count of three, play chase, sing their favorite song, and so on. One of these is bound to shake off the mood/nerves/disinterest/canned grin. For the toughest little one I’ve ever had, playing music on the phone did the trick after trying all these other things.

And finally:

Please please please release yourself from the stress of a getting particular outcome.
It’s hard to do - I get it. It’s like saying “Don’t think about the color green.” You’ve invested time and money to schedule, book, and get everyone to the session. You’ve cleaned, changed, and dressed everyone, and maybe bribed them a little bit. (By the way, when it comes to portrait sessions, I’m all about the bribery.)

I don’t have kids (was a nanny for a decade), but even I’ve felt this when photographing my pup Mabel. See her official headshot on AVEX’s website. I swear she listens so much better when we don’t need her to. Maybe she can sense something in me as I ask her to sit sit sit sit stay.

But this is real life. Kids are unpredictable - and changing every minute of every day. That’s ok - it’s great actually! We’ll document who they are and what they’re feeling in that very moment. It’s all adorable and messy and real. Let’s just make the session as fun (and not scary) as we can. (I’m hearing the song “Let It Go” in my head right now.)

I’m nearly certain we’ve always gotten something to work with. And I joke: if we’re not tired and dirty, then we’re not done.

Please don’t fret: more often than not it’s going to feel like chaos, but the images will still look great. This is akin to my headshot slogan of “Feels weird, looks great”. We just need those split-split seconds to make a photograph, and the rest can dissolve into a beautiful mess.  

This is real life, baby - let’s photograph it!

Minneapolis Family Portrait Photographer On Location Client Home Lauren B. Photography

All portraits in this post are from a recent session at the client’s home and near Bde Maka Ska. Their feedback warms my heart:

“HOW DO YOU DO THIS SORCERY?!?!?! I haven't seen a hairdresser since February, H is the most self aware he's ever been, and WHAT MAGIC RABBIT DO YOU PULL FROM A HAT?! Ugh, love these. and you. Thanks for capturing us so well, as always.”